Grab bag. Not crap bag, but grab bag. TV show anyone??

So....I fell of my posting spree. Sorry to my faithful reader.

Nothing too exciting has happened in my lapse. Except for this amusing conversation I had while working a chocolate fountain at a wedding on Saturday:

Scene: It's 10:25 pm. I'm standing behind the chocolate fountain table, getting ready to take it down. Along comes drunk guy.

Drunk guy: "You look pretty bored back there. You wanna go dance?"
Me: "Nah, that's OK. I gotta start taking this thing down. Thanks, though."
Drunk guy: "C'mon, you're allowed! I'll let you! Let's go dance!"
Me: "No, it's really OK. I have stuff to do around here."
Drunk guy: "You have to watch this thing the whole time?"
Me: "Pretty much."
Drunk guy: "Well, what are you doing after this?"
Me: "Going home."
Drunk guy: "What are you gonna do? Just go to sleep?"
Me: "Well, I'll probably hang out with my husband for a little bit first."
Drunk guy: "Oh....you're married?"
Me: "Yup."
Drunk guy: "Yeah......me too."

I was trying really hard not to laugh in his face. It was hilarious. Too bad he wasn't good looking.

They found random busy work for me to do so I had no time to surf. Boo. I wound up getting sick on Tuesday night and called in sick for my last day on Wednesday. Suckas!!! So I slept all day Wednesday trying to fight it off and I'm still not 100% but hopefully by tomorrow I will be. Our friends Jason and Erica are flying in from NYC tonite to hang out through Labor Day. We're going down to Chicago tomorrow and I'm soooo excited. Wildfire for dinner tomorrow, Cubs game on Saturday. Come back on Sunday, then tailgating and Brewers game on Monday. Oh yeah, and shopping in between with Erica!! Yay!

Bought my textbooks today. $563. And I still have one more to find. Ugh. I've already got a couple syllabi from online and already have a crapload of reading to do. Boo.

Well, we should start heading for the airport. Happy Labor Day everyone!!

**NEWSFLASH** I POOP!!!

This post will be about pooping. So if you are easily grossed out, I suggest you stop reading now. Not that I will be overly graphic, but I know some people get squeamish at the word "bathroom"...so, fair warning.

First, some history.

When I was 17 and in high school, the summer before my Senior year, I started to get really sick. Not really chronic, but more sporadic chest pains. I'd never had anything like that before. After many sleepless nights due to chest pain, I finally went in to see a doctor. They did bloodwork but that didn't reveal anything. They finally resorted to an ultrasound and do you know what they found?? A baby. Just kidding!! They found gallstones. Yes, me, a 17-year-old girl had gallstones. Bizarre. My doc told me I was the youngest patient he'd ever seen with them. They weren't huge, they were itty bitty, which are the worst kind b/c they get stuck right in your bile duct and cause mucho pain. Well, I had laproscopic surgery to remove my gallbladder (Nov. 2, 1998). After a month or so of recovery I started to realize something was different. I was pooping a lot. And they weren't always just "normal" poops, if you know what I mean. Well, it hasn't stopped.

Fast forward to today. Last year or so I went to the doctor b/c my overactive colon was especially overactive. More bloodwork confirmed that I did not have celiac's disease (although I'd really like a retest...with a biopsy, which is the only sure way to diagnose). I was put on this medication used to lower cholesterol by absorbing bile salts. Which makes sense logically since my bile has no where to go anymore. It just shoots straight to my intestines and super-digests my food. Well, the stuff is gross, it's an orange-flavored powder you mix into your drink, so I don't really take it that often. I know, I should, but I don't.

(There really is a point to all this)

I usually go at lunchtime, for whatever reason. And I'm usually at school or work. In a public bathroom. I really hope I'm not the only one out there like this, but I have a hard time pooping if someone else is in the bathroom. I try to be as quiet as I can, as if pooping is somehow shameful or unnatural, when in fact, it's the complete opposite of that. I think that if our poop smelled like cotton candy it wouldn't be held in such disgust. But anyway. I bring this all up b/c today I was in the bathroom doing my business, quietly of course, when a lady walks into the stall next to me, sits down, pees, and then proceed to swiftly and succinctly drop 4 individual splasher poops. It was loud. Then she wiped (only once...lucky girl), pretended to wash her hands (I wish I could have seen who it was so I could know to NEVER EVER shake her hand), and was outta there, in seriously 1 minute. It was the fastest trip ever. But here's my question. Am I abnormal for being embarrassed to poop in a public bathroom when others are present? Splasher Poop lady just did her business like it was a matter-of-fact thing. I wish I could do that. Thing is, I know when I hear someone else splashing and squirting in the next stall, I'm all like "Ew! Gross!" and at the same time laughing, like a freaking 5-year-old!!

When I was in college I went to the bathroom during work. I did the usual feet check and got down to business. I had just eaten lunch and I was feeling especially sick. Rumbly, if you will. Well, I pooped, without inhibitions. I think I even sighed after I was done. I went to grab the TP, and what what what??? I hear the TP rolling in the stall RIGHT NEXT TO ME!!! I froze!!! I almost died!! Of course, I had to stay in my stall until the girl washed her hands, combed her hair, retouched her makeup, and do whatever else she was doing. I'm sure she was just stalling to see who it was that was fighting a battle right next to her. I wanted to flush myself right down with my poop.

Anyway, I'd really like to be able to just poop and be done with it, no matter where I am or who I'm with. My friends know about it, but I still don't want to poop if they're in the bathroom with me. That's just gross!! Oh, and it's not just a one-time deal. I usually have to go once more, about 5-10 minutes after. And then I'm fine. So really, I need suggestions on how to poop!! Without being embarrassed!!! Help!! I really do freak out about it, and I have to make sure I know where the bathroom is everywhere I go. B/c once nature knocks, there's no ignoring her.

And one more thing: Since I've been wearing skirts more lately, what's the proper thing to do when using the bathroom? I hike the skirt up around my waist, but then I'm so paranoid about it touching the back park or the flusher or whatever. But if I pulled it down, it would lay on the ground, and that's just nasty. I don't think i was ever taught the right way to do this, if there is a right way. Any opinions?

For serious, I need help. Leave an anonymous comment if you don't want people to know that you poop, too. Hopefully I didn't leave you with mental images of me on the can. Ha! Too late!

Poopy Mondays

Ugh. Mondays. Hate 'em. Been sitting here at work for an hour and a half and so far have done about 2 minutes of work.

A big Happy Birthday shout-out to my mom, who turns FIFTY today!!!!

This weekend was fairly uneventful. Friday's shower went well, I guess. I was diasappointed at the number of people that showed up, but oh well. Sometime I forget that Mormons are the biggest flakes and cheap-o's ever. Lame. Saturday was the laziest of days. I only slept in until 9:30. Bizarre. I think b/c I was hungry. Went to the mall b/c Sephora was giving out free Stila lipglazes so I snagged one. Then we headed to the other mall to have my ring checked out. I noticed at work the other day that it looks like a corner of my diamond is chipped. Yikes! So I took it in and it turns out, yes, it is chipped. Sad!! Luckily, my diamond has a lifetime warranty, so they will replace it with a diamond of the same clarity and size and whatnot. But I like MY diamond. We looked at tons of diamonds, and although mine isn't the highest clarity, it's super nice for what it is. You can't see any inclusions under a scope or with the nekked eye. So they are ordering some diamonds in for us to look at. I may decide not to replace it right now if they diamonds are ugly. I told Derrick it must mean it's time for an upgrade. ;) He wasn't buying it.

We decided to go to a new restaurant for dinner. I had heard some good things about it, even though the reviews online weren't so great. It's a Mexican place on the Southside called Conejitos (which means little rabbit for you gringos). It was actually pretty good. And super cheap. And it better be, considering your dinner comes out on paper plates!!! We got chips and salsa, a Coke, and I got chicken enchiladas with refried beans, and Derrick got 4 steak tacos. Grand total of $10.60. Can't beat that!! We'll be going back for sure. Oh, the salsa was really good. Spicy, but fresh and yummy.

Books go on sale today for Fall Semester. Gah. 2 weeks. I wasn't really ready for school until I took this temp job. I'm soooo ready for school now. Plus, I'm excited for new school supplies. When I was a kid I loved back to school time. I would take out my new backpack and pencils and notebooks everyday and look at them and arrange them and countdown the days until the first day of school. What a DORK!! Still, it's like a fresh start. Clean slate. Love it. What I do not love, however, is paying for books! Last semester I paid over 800. This semester they have a deal tho, and you get all the books in a bundle and it comes with CDs of all the books that you can install and create folders and cross-search for topics. Should be pretty cool. If I use it. Ha. I think the bundle is $500, at least that's what my friends say. I already bought one book off a friend who took the summer class. So that saved some cash. I have NO BOOKSHELF space to put these suckers. It's already busting at the seams. What to do, what to do...

I'm going to take some cooking classes this fall. The one I really want to take is the Sushi class, but I think I will take the Dim Sum and Slow Cooker class too. They're only $7 each, and it's a one night class for 2 hours. Hopefully I can get some other people to take it with me. We'll see. No one seems to like to come out of their holes and do anything. Maybe b/c they have kids. Still, make the hubby watch them for 2 hours, they'll survive.

So I had to laugh when I read this joke this morning. It's kinda gross, but I thought it was hilarious.

An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, "Seven Points."
His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?"
The old man replied, "It's fart football."
A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says "Touchdown, tie score."
After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7."
Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score."
Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14."
Now the pressure is on the old man. He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard.
Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally poops in the bed.
The wife says, "What the heck was that?"
The old man says, "Half time, switch sides."

Ha!!

Wristy

Well, yesterday my work plans changed a whopping 3 times in a matter of hours. What I thought was to be a short morning of working turned out to be another whole day. I had another job lined up for next week Monday-Wednesday, but that was cancelled after the people here called and requested me here another week. So, I'll be here in this office for one more week. I'm not a huge fan of this job, but it pays more than the other, so I guess I'll stay. My left wrist is killing me. The wrist I broke sledding in college. Yes, sledding. Well, tubing, actually. Lame, I know. It was Matthew, who I was dating at the time, Dan, and Maria I think?? Cheryl? I don't remember. It took about 3 hours of prep to go tubing at Rock Canyon--finding tubes, blowing them up, getting dressed. We were super pumped to go. Well, we get there and the hill is perfect with fresh snow. It's dark by this point, but lots of people are there doing the same thing. Well, we hop on our tubes and head down. My first ride down I go just normal, sitting on top of the tube, and I hit a bump and it lofts me up into the air and I go left and my tube goes right. And then I come slamming down onto probably the only patch of ground not cushioned by snow. My left arm is underneath me. I just laid there. I didn't know I had broken anything at that point, but something didn't feel right. Matthew came over and asked if I was alright, I said "I guess so", but when I stood up my hand was at this wonky angle. Like, the pinky side of my hand was at a right angle to my arm. That can't be good. So, everyone packed up and we went to the ER. Way to ruin the fun, Karen! We sat in the ER until they called us back and I had to peel all 5 of my layers over my hand, which was killing me by that time. The doc came in, numbed me, then pulled and yanked on the end of my fingers to straighten it all out. It was pretty cool to watch. They threw me in a soft cast and away I went. And ever since that day it has hurt. I can't keep my palm turned up for very long, and using the Tab button repeatedly kills. Wow, that was a tangent, eh? Derrick will tell you I broke it because I didn't go to the BYU game that was happening at the time we went tubing. Punishment for my sin, if you will. (As I type this, the Imperial March from Star Wars is playing on Ike and instantly reminds me of BYU football games. Coincidence??? Creepy.)

So that's what's going on. Tonite is a bridal shower for a friend. It's a surprise, but I don't think she even knows about the Wet Donkey. Poor thing. ;) Anyway, I'll be surprised if 5 people show up, everyone has bailed on me. So lame. Hopefully it's fun anyway. Hope everyone's Friday is good! Mine will be much better in 2 hours and 5 minutes!!

It's Thursday.

I started a new temp job on Tuesday and they told me it would be around 2 weeks. Sweet. Just before school starts. So I show up on Tuesday thinking I'm doing receptionist stuff but really I'm just an Excel monkey. Data entry. Luckily (or perhaps unluckily) for me, I know a thing or two about excel and put my copy and paste skills to work. Apparently the people here have never worked with a capable employee, b/c they couldn't get over how efficient I am and how I ask questions and blah blah blah. Well, I guess I did too good of a job because today is my last day. And supposedly not even a full one at that. Sheesh. It's okay tho, I didn't really love it here. No one has talked to me except for my bosses (2 ladies), and there's this lady a couple cubicles away with the most annoying voice. One of those where each word is deliberate and very choppy. I've heard it somewhere else before but I can't figure out who she sounds like. Oooh! Kind of like the band girl in American Pie. But much more distinct.

As of right now, they are looking for some work to give me, and Hallelujia I have internet access or I'd go bonkers. Nothing appears to be blocked, either. Hooray! Yesterday I paid bills and read Craigslist. We'll see what fun today brings.

It sorta works out that I have some free time today b/c I have lots of errands to run. Post office to send my mom her birthday present--50!!! Yikes!! Bed, Bath, and Beyond for a wedding gift, Bath and Body Works to exchange a shower gel I thought was lotion, (I only noticed it wasn't after I had slathered it all over my hands and arms the other night before bed), Old Navy to return a shirt I bought for Derrick that he didn't like (although there is nothing wrong with it), and maybe Ulta to pick up some hair glaze to get the I-need-to-change-my-hair-somehow mood out of my system without doing something terribly drastic like chopping it all off.

We saw The DaVinci Code on Tuesday night. I thought it was pretty good. Very entertaining, if nothing else. I read the book about 3 years ago and thought I had forgotten most of it. But as I watched it all came back to me. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about Tom Hanks as Robert Langdon, but overall it was a fun movie to watch. I kept thinking about if they ever made Angels and Demons into a movie how they would do it. I mean, can they overtake the Vatican to make a movie? Has it been done?? Well, I guess it has in Eurotrip...(which, by the way, is hilarious, although completely crass.)

Last night I put my hair in pin curls, after reading a tutorial online about how to do it. Not hard, really. The girl in the tutorial has the cutest, soft waves when she was done. Like the waves I want! So I did it. And this morning when I took out the bobbies, I was fully prepared to see my soft, sexy waves come cascading down upon my shoulders. Instead, it was like Medusa on crack with an afro. NOT CUTE!! NOT SEXY!! It was horrible. Weird random curls going every which direction. So I ran my fingers through them to break it up hoping it would help. Well, I just ended up with lots of weird random curls going every which direction. And then it looked like big 80's hair. Which would have been sweet if if were National 80's Hair Day. But it's not. So I had to bust out the flat iron and do some damage control.

RAVE: Queen Helene's Mint Julep Masque

This mask rocks. It's green and minty fresh! You put it on and it literally SUCKS out your blackheads. You can even even see the little oily spots on the mask after it's dried. I put it on Derrick and it works on him, too. He needs another session to really clear them out. I took a picture, but he'd kill me if I posted it. That's okay, I get enough satisfaction knowing I just talked about it. :) Anyway, great product, and bonus--only like $2.99! AND it's BOGO at Walgreens right now! Score!

Well, I can't think of anything else. They still haven't found work for me. That's ok. I like getting paid $12/hr to blog. :)

Another one bites the dust...

Well, I guess Mary-Kate just couldn’t bear to live without her sister, because this morning she was belly-up. This just proves that I am incapable of supporting a life other than my own.

Lara suggested a Beta fish, which I considered. I had one in college, Sushi, that I inherited from my roommate Maika when she got deployed to Iraq. Sushi was a pretty good fish, and I liked having him around. Occasionally the heat would go out in our attic apartment and Sushi would freeze to death. Literally freeze to death. I would come home and he would be stiff and lifeless. I took him out of the bowl and poked him with a paperclip, but didn’t have the heart to flush him just then. So I put him back, and the next day when the heat came back on…Miracle of Miracles!!! He came back to life!!!! It was amazing! That happened once more but the third time proved to be too much for his little fishy heart, and he died. Anyway, I think I’ve had enough fish for awhile. I don’t like it when they die. And, I don’t really like cleaning their bowl either…A pet person I am not. Oh well.

Well, only 7 more hours of work today. If you have any good links, send em my way. I’m gonna need em!

Happy weekend

The fair was awesome. Love every bit of it. I had my cream puff for breakfast and cheese curds for lunch. mmmmm. We played bingo in the morning and these nice ladies helped up figure out what kinds of bingo we were looking for. They have crazy shapes these days...small turtle, crazy kite, crazy arrow. Whatever happened to just normal bingo?? Anyway, we didn't win any of those. But at the end there was one last bingo where everyone stands up and if a number on your card is called you are out. I got out on like the 3rd number so I had to leave, but Derrick won!! His card was the biggest loser!!! We won a backpack type thingie, a Potowatomi t-shirt, a calendar/calculator thingie, and $25 to Potowatomi! Sweet!

We saw all the animals, and the cutest baby piggies and goats. And I got to meet Chip, the Midwest Airlines guy!! I didn't even know he existed!!

After the fair and Paige's birthday party we went to dinner downtown at Butch's Old Casino Steakhouse. We were superpumped, heard it was good. I was less than impressed. Yes, it was perhaps the most tender steak I have ever eaten, but there was zero taste. No flavor. I was so disappointed. Soooooo bummed. So, we won't be going back there. Ever.

Then it was onto the concert!!! It was actually pretty good. They all sang individually, ending with Taylor, then came back with an encore and they all came out and sang together. My favorite was Lisa. She actually sat at a piano and sang a couple of Elton John songs. It was really good. Everyone was screaming when Chris came out, it was insane. For the most part, everyone sounded like they did on TV, and we were pretty impressed.



For some reason, Blogger's not letting me upload any more pictures, and it deleted some I had already posted. :( Well, I'll try later.

Boo Sunday nights. Just means work on Monday. Ugh.

RIP

Well, she lasted a valiant 8 days out in the real world before going to the Great Fishbowl in the Sky. Ashely Olsen-Callister passed away sometime last night between the hours of 6:20 and 11:45 PM. It was quite sad. I didn't cry, though. You would have been very proud. I feel bad for Mary-Kate, though. She is lonely, and hides in the fake plastic tree all day long. Anyway, if you would just keep our family in your thoughts today as we mourn her loss.

Ashley Olsen-Callister
August 3, 2006-August 11, 2006

Reduce, reuse, recycle!!

Another boring day temping, this time at a recycling facility. Well, the accounting office. I get to wear a super sweet Madonna-esqe headset to answer the phones. It’s actually killing my temples. Maybe it’s my headband. Who knows. All I know is they are not compatible together. At least I have internet access, including email, which is nice. I already did all the work I was supposed to do, so now I’m just hanging out. Really, I don’t feel bad. I’m a freaking TEMP for heavens sake. Deal with it.

So I think my car is sick. I think it’s the battery, which is lame, since I just bought a new one back in March, and these things are supposed to be good for what, 5 years??? I hope I can find the receipt, b/c I’m NOT buying a new one. It wouldn’t even start this morning. I had to pop the hood and wiggle the connections a bit and then it started. This is not good. Plus, the connections looks all gross with build up and whatever. That can’t be good either. It also need to be aligned in a baaaad way. You know those little seats in zoos and amusement parks that you sit on a feed it a quarter and it massages your feet? Well, that’s what it feels like when I go about 65, except my whole body gets a massage. I keep imagining that one day it’s going to shake so much that it will just pop apart, and the tires will flatten and lay down and go “whoosh!” like on cartoons when the car dies. So sad.

My sty for the most part is gone. I tried the hair in the tear duct thing, and it didn’t really make me cry, and it went in pretty far. Who knows what healed it. Personally, I think not wearing makeup did. Derrick will swear by the drops, even though the expiration date printed on the side says “06/00”. Yikes.

30 Days is back on FX. What a great show. If you get a chance, watch it. It’s sooo interesting. And funny. Morgan Spurlock, creator Super Size Me, is hilarious.

Well, that’s all I got. Pretty slow, uneventful day. Have a great Weekend! Tomorrow is busy busy, so I doubt if I’ll get a chance to post. I know, try to hold back the tears. I’m sure Monday in this place will be equally as slow with plenty of posting time.

Till then!

Nudie Magazine Day!! Nudie Magazine Day!!

Ok, it really wasn't Nudie Magazine Day (anyone got a movie guess?), but that's how I feel when it's Chocolate Eclair day at Culver's!!! My most favoritist flavor of all time. For those non Wisconsinites, they don't really sell ice cream here, it's all about the custard. And Culver's has the best. It's smooth and creamy and oh-so-good. And what's better than custard, but custer will chocolate eclairs mixed in??? It's like a cream puff+custard explosion in your mouth, and I am happier than a clam when I eat it. It was the perfect dessert for me tonite, since tonite my husband had a gourmet steak dinner courtesy of a super rich vendor while I ate a less than yummy batch of Blue Box, aka Yellow Death, aka Kraft Dinner. Usually it's one of my favorites, (I know, I know, where did I leave my trailer again???), but today it just wasn't hittin' the spot. Although, I was disappointed in the quality of my batch. It was funky. Is it pathetic that I look online and see when Chocolate Eclair day is coming so I can write it on the calendar?? Yes?? Well, I don't really give a care. (Ha, 80's anyone?)

Derrick brought me beautiful yellow roses yesterday for our anniversary. I need to take a pic and post them, they're very cheerful and fun. He liked the old skool Brewer's cap I got him, but it's too big for his heed. It's also a little ghettofied, and looks kinda wonky on him. It's the kind of hat that had a really wide brim and a tall front. Oh well. Hafta exchange it I guess.

I can't believe that another terrorist attack was in the works. At least they caught it before it was too late. Everyone is complaining about the inconvenience of waiting in lines and throwing out products and such (which I admittedly would be a little miffed about) but I think tossing my shampoop is a small price to pay for our safety. Thanks to all those who work hard to protect us.

Top 50 Worst Songs of All Time

I started browing through random blogs on blogger and came across this: VH1's top 50 Worst Songs of All Time. And while I agree with some, I was shocked to learn that most of them I loved!! What does that say about my taste in music?? Or are the puppets at VH1 just morons and don't know a good song when they hear one?? What follows is the list, accompanied by my comments in parentheses....

50. Corey Hart - I Wear My Sunglasses at Night (Love it)
49. Puff Daddy f/ Faith Evans & 112 - "I'll Be Missing You' (Love Diddy...classic 90's song)
48. Michael Bolton - 'Can I Touch You There' (OK, they win with MB)
47. Bobby Brown w/Whitney Houston, 'Something in Common'
46. Spin Doctors - Two Princes
45. Ruben Studdard, 'I'm Sorry' (True, this song SUCKS)
44. Billy Joel - We Didn't Start The Fire (Sorry Derrick, this song really is LAME)
43. Master P feat. Silkk, Fiend, Mia-x & Mystikal - 'Make Em Say Uhh' (Um, this song shaped my high school experience)
42. Rednex - Cotton Eye Joe (Stake dance staple!)
41. JC Chasez - 'Some Girls (Dance with Women)'
40. 4 Non Blondes, 'What's Up' (Again, a high school classic)
39. Snow - 'Informer' (Love it. Have no idea what he says, love it just the same)
38. Ja Rule - Mesmerize
37. Bette Midler, "From a Distance" (ew. totally hate this song)
36. Color Me Badd - I Wanna Sex You Up (I was 9 when I first heard this song. i thought i was so naughty listening to it. not a 50 worst, that's for sure)
35. Don Johnson - Heartbeat
34. Crazytown - 'Butterfly' (what?? great song)
33. Jennifer Lopez - 'Jenny from the Block' (really, i can think of five HUNDRED other worse songs)
32. Mr. Mister - Broken Wings
31. R. Kelly, 'You Remind Me of Something'
30. Nelly - Pimp Juice
29. Meatloaf - 'I Would Do Anything for Love (But I Won't do That) (OK song. Dr. Pepper thought it was cool enough)
28. Rick Astley - 'Never Gonna Give You Up' (This is on my "Happy" playlist!!)
27. Wreckx-N-Effect - 'Rump Shaker' (The awesome bikini-clad-sax-player-in-the-surf video isn't enough to pull it out of this list??? gah!!)
26. Bryan Adams - The Only Thing That Looks Good on Me is You
25. Michael Jackson, 'You Rock My World' (Love all things MJ. Except the nose)
24. Phil Collins, "Sussudio" (Classic 80's. Annoyingly catchy)
23. Sisqo - 'The Thong Song' (Not a lame song. NOT!)
22. Lionel Richie - Dancing on the Ceiling (You can't blame Lionel for being gay songs. You just have to love him for it.)
21. Rembrandts, "I'll Be There For You" (How are you going to put the theme song from the most popular sit-com of the 90's on a 50 worst list??)
20. Toby Keith, 'Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue' (Yeah, this one is a little over the top)
19. Chicago - You're the Inspiration (If it weren't for this song, how would the 12 year old greasy boys dance with the cute girls??)
18. Hammer - 'Pumps and a Bump'
17. Right Said Fred, "I'm Too Sexy" (Dude, this song rocks)
16. Europe, "The Final Countdown"
15. Crash Test Dummies - Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, Mmm (This is a great song. I'm shaking my fist at you VH1!!)
14. Will Smith, "Will2K"
13. Aqua - 'Barbie Girl' (I shall always think of Maria fondly when I think of this song. While I can see how many would think this song sucks, and it slightly does, it's still a fun song.)
12. New Kids on the block - Hangin' Tough (I won't stand for anyone dissing NKOTB. If it weren't for I love the 80's, I might be tempted to stop watching VH1.)
11. Gerardo - Rico Suave
10. Huey Lewis & the News - Heart of Rock-n-Roll (I like it. Derrick thinks they are saying "The heart of rock n roll is in Cleveland. It makes me laugh. Although the Rock n Roll hall of fame is there, I'm pretty sure they say "the heart of rock n roll is a'beatin. Correct me if I'm wrong.)
9. Bobby McFerrin - Don't Worry Be Happy (C'mon! He's just telling people to be happy!)
8. Ricky Martin - She Bangs (yeah, this song sucks. But William Hung does NOT.)
7. Eddie Murphy, "Party All the Time"
6. Deep Blue Something, "Breakfast at Tiffany's" (Like it)
5. Vanilla Ice, "Ice Ice Baby" (You HAVE to like it if you were born in the 80s. It's law.)
4. Limp Bizkit, "Rollin'" (Decent)
3. Wang Chung - Everybody Have Fun Tonight (Everybody Wang Chung tonite!!!)
2. Billy Ray Cyrus, "Achy Breaky Heart" (Boo.)
1. Starship, "We Built This City" (I officially hate VH1. How you gonna make this the number 1 worst song??)

So there you have it. I don't agree. I should make my own list. I think I will.

3!

Happy Anniversary to us!! 3 whole years! I remember being just married and talking to girls who had been married 2 or 3 years. I thought it sounded like FOREVER. Now, in our circle of friends, we are among those who have been married the longest. Sure, there are some who have reached the 5 year mark, but some are just celebrating 1 year! I really can’t believe it’s been 3 years. What harder to believe is that 2 of those years have been spent in Wisconsin! Weird. Sometimes we sit and say to each other, “Do we really live in Milwaukee??” It’s a weird thought. Anyway, no big plans for tonite…Derrick has a softball game so we’ll go to that. Make dinner. Watch The Hills. We are going to celebrate on Saturday—it’s going to be one busy day. Fair in the morning, birthday party for Paige (her one year birthday was yesterday!), then dinner, then American Idols Live! Still trying to sell the extra ticket…any takers?? Also, any suggestions as to where to go to dinner? Somewhere downtown preferably, although it doesn’t have to be. And somewhere super yummy.

So having read my eye plight, Antony recommended that I rub gold on my eye and that would cure my sty. Something about a crazy Spanish remedy. Well, I was skeptical, of course. How could rubbing gold on my eye make a sty go away? I tried it anyway, and when I woke up this morning….I WAS RIGHT!!! It was a load of crap!! Didn’t do ANYTHING! Thanks anyway, Antony. I did, however, remember to bring the eyedrops with me today, and it hasn’t itched that much. I think it’s all psychological. Yesterday I knew I didn’t have them, so it itched like crazy. Same thing with chapstick (to which I am EXTREMELY addicted to). I can leave the house and forget my chapstick and be totally fine until I realize I forgot it and then my lips will ache for it. Of course, this rarely happens, seeing as how I have a tube in every room of the house, in every purse, in my car, in my backpack, pretty much everywhere. I’m pretty ticked b/c I lost my Burt’s Bees somewhere, and I actually liked it. Of course, Chapstick Mint is the absolute best. I’m not entirely sure where I picked up this habit. I do remember licking my lips a lot when I was a kid and they would get so chapped they would turn purple. Maybe it started then. My first tube was Chapstick cherry. Smells soooo good. Safe to say, however, that I’ve carried chapstick every single day of my life since at least 1990. And I will probably carry it with me when I move into a nursing home and my lips are just wee little strips of wrinkled flesh. But at least they’ll be soft and moisturized!! Derrick says I need to kick the habit. Whatever, dude. The day you stop watching SportsCenter will be the day I stop wearing chapstick. And we all know that day is never.

You know what would be awesome?? To have a job testing out beauty products. Makeup and shampoos and masks and stuff like that. Anyone know of a job like that? I practically do it anyway, but it would be super sweet to actually get paid for it! There’s a cool website called MakeupAlley that has reviews on practically everything, so if you’re thinking of trying something, check out the reviews first if you want to research a little before you buy it. I’m on it all the time.

Since work has been less-than-exciting, I’ve been playing Sudoku online. I never really got into that craze, and after playing it, I’m still not that into it. I’d much rather do crosswords. Sudoku is challenging, but I guess I’m more of a word puzzler than a number puzzler. Unless it’s the number fill-in puzzles. I love those. Anyway, not much else to talk about. Guess I’ll go find a game to play.

Happy Hump Day!

The EYE has it

I woke up today and my eye was HUGE!! The entire lower lid is completely swollen. How attractive. Derrick put some drop in my eyes this morning and told me to take them with me today in case they start itching again. Well, it’s itching like crazy. Where are the drops?? Oh, right. At home on the bathroom counter. Great. It totally hurts. It hurt all night b/c I sleep on my stomach and turn my head to the side and sleep on my eye. OW. I steered clear of all eyeshadowy things today, and I’m looking pretty scary, but hopefully it’s all in the name of kicking this thing in the arse. I look like I got beat up.

It’s a slow day today here at work. I brought in my new Lucky mag which I got yesterday hoping that it would take up a chunk of time. Well, it’s 9:30 and I’ve already finished it. Shoulda brought something else. Like the encyclopedia. Tomorrow’s the last day of this assignment, and then on Friday and Monday I’m working for Waste Management. Ha. Just office stuff. Derrick laughed when I told him where. Something along the lines of that’s just where garbage belongs.

Happy Anniversary to Adam & Becka!

We bought our tickets to Boston last night. It is going to be a super short trip. We get in Friday night and leave Sunday night. It’s nice b/c we don’t have to miss work or school. And we’ll only have to spend 2 nights in a hotel, and I think we’re splitting it 6 ways (wow, won’t THAT be fun…) so hopefully it’s cheap. Actually, it will be a lot of fun. Some of my most favorite people will be there. Scott, my step-in husband. Jason, my surrogate older brother and his adorable wife, Erica. All of us love to eat, so I’m sure we’ll be doing that mostly. And talk about sports. Well, the guys will, at least. Hopefully Erica and I can slip off and go shopping.

4 more days until we go to the State Fair!! I can’t wait!! Cream Puffs, flavored milk, chicks and bunnies, racing pigs, cheese curds, the birthing barn, the junk tents. Love it. Can’t get enough of it. It’s a white trash holiday. I’ll see if I can whip up a mullet and fit in this year. :)

Season 2 of Laguna Beach comes out today!!! I never watched them, but Derrick did, and now we watch The Hills. I wanted to get caught up, so last weekend when we babysat overnight for a friend we rented Season 1. Gotta watch Season 2 before Season 3 starts!! Kristin Cavalleri is really cute, but a turbo bitch. And Jason is an ass. I do like LC tho, except if she gives up Paris to stay with Jason for the summer, my opinion of her will drop severely. Like, totally, omigosh!

My friend Sabahat supposedly had her baby yesterday so I’m gonna swing by during lunch and go visit her. How exciting!!

Ok, that’s all I can think of to ramble about right now.

I am the switchboard QUEEN

So I’m sitting here at work, with nothing to do but answer the phone. I do have internet access, I discovered. Just not to email. I’ve already checked my Bloglines and caught up with those. I checked the weather. I couldn’t get to Ebay directly, I had to get there by clicking the link on my favorites bar. I tried to sell some pants, but they didn’t sell. Guess I’ll try Craigslist next. Which I already read, too. I can get to LiveJournal, but sometimes the stuff there is NSFW (not safe for work), so I’m hesitant to read that yet. We’ll see.

I have a sty in my left eye. And it really hurts. Hurts to blink, and it itches. And when I try to scratch it indirectly, it hurts. I’ve never really had them growing up, but recently I seem to get them more often. I had one in my right eye last week. I wonder if it’s makeup related. I go easy on it when I get one and it usually goes away. Still, they suck. I clean my brushes every night so it can’t be from that. Hmmm…any suggestions/ideas?

I’ve read a lot about Tea Tree Oil lately and how it helps with blemishes, which I have a lot of these days. So I picked some up at Wal-Mart and I’ve been using it the past couple of days, spot treating, and it is working great! I only use it at night, and the smell is pretty strong, which I’m still getting used to, but so far, so good! If you have sensitive skin you might want to dilute it but my skin is like an elephant’s apparently, so I just put it straight out of the vial onto my skin. It’s probably my favorite thing of the week. Besides my pillow. Hmmm…I wonder if either of those are contributing to my stys…

A big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my pops, who turns 46 today. Which means it’s MY half birthday!! Hooray!! Not that I’m celebrating getting older….ew. Freak, halfway to 26! Yikes! I don’t feel that old, which I guess is really all that matters, right? Right.

Well, I don’t have anything else to blab about really. If something comes up perhaps I’ll post again. I have a feeling nothing will tho…

Tag! I'm it!

Lara tagged me! So here I go!


One Book:

One book that changed my life:
The Jungle by Upton Sinclair. I loved it. I had no idea stuff like that happened back then. Some really gross parts, but that's why I loved it. Gave me a great appreciation for those that paved the way to me eating a nice germ-free steak.

One Book that I have read more than once:
Ender's Game. I'm not really a sci-fi kinda person, but I love this book.

One Book I would want on a deserted Island:
I agree with Lara about the quadruple combo, but if I could take another one and not be damned, I'd take the dictionary. And memorize it.

One book that made me laugh:
The Devil Wears Prada. I haven't seen the movie yet, but I'm dying to.

One book that made me cry:
Jack Weyland's Sam & Charly. I bawled. Like, for an hour.

One book I wish I'd written:
Hmm...Charlotte's Web. Who doesn't love that book? I'm excited for the movie to come out!

One Book that I am Currently Reading:
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. My mom gave it to me to read this summer. I'm not very far, but so far it's good.

One Book I've been meaning to read:
1984

People I'm tagging: Antony, Sam, Alexis, and Shannon!

Rubber baby buggy bumpers

My friend and I threw a baby shower today, which actually had a good turnout and lots of cute gifts. My mom told me about this great watermelon site with cute ideas and stuff and I decided to make a watermelon baby carriage. It was pretty fun to make, and I think it turned out pretty cute. Check it out:



Cool, huh?

We saw Over the Hedge today. SO CUTE! We were laughing the whole time. It really was a cute and clever movie. If you have kids and haven't seen this, I highly recommend it. Adorable.



Nothing else exciting happening. Mary-Kate and Ashley are still alive. Although I've yet to see them eat. Maybe they're on a hunger strike protesting being bought and taken away from their "family." Who knows. They better start eating soon, though!! There's starving fish in Africa that would love to have the food they're wasting!

Bedtime bliss...

It's Kohl's employee shop days this weekend...so we went tonite. I've been wanting new pillows for awhile, so I finally got some. HOLY CRAP. Let me just say I cannot WAIT to go to sleep tonite. I got a 100% down-filled pillow to replace my old one. I completely believe the mite poop myth, seeing as how my old one weighs, no joke, at LEAST 10 times heavier than my new one. Incredible. My new one rocks. It's like sleeping on a huge fluffy marshmallow cloud. Luuurve it. Derrick will sleep on anything, so we got some regular firm ones, but even those are super comfy. It came in a twin pack, so I have one as a back up, but I doubt I'll be using it!! That really is the highlight of my day.

My new temp job is pretty sweet. Just a receptionist, but it's in a way cool developer firm's office. Lots of good looking guys. Stocked fridge. Should be easy-peasy. And only 3 days.

Well, I'm so excited, I think I'll go to sleep now. I might never wake up....

Our family is growing!!

Well, I guess the time has come to introduce you to the two newest members of our family. They've been a long time coming, and I proudly present to you......



Mary-Kate and Ashley!!!! And they're already acting like them, too. They haven't touched their dinner. I just hope they don't die....It's nice having company, even if they are $.28 goldfish.

I start a new gig as a receptionist for a developing company tomorrow through Wed. We'll see how it goes!

Happy birthday, my love!

Has there ever been a hotter football player? The answer, of course, is no.

Crap, crap, everywhere, and not a toilet to flush.

We have a lot of crap in our apartment. It somehow just accumulates. Anyone who has ever been over can attest to that. I try my best to hide it. The worst part is our clothes. If all the laundry is done, there really isn't anywhere to keep it all. Not enough hangers, not enough drawers. So I said enough is enough!! And the other night we both went through all of our clothes and chucked anything we didn't wear or like anymore. We both have t-shirts that are forever old, but we are both slightly sentimental about them and hated to throw them out. So I saved the ones we liked, and I'm going to cut them up and make a quilt out of them. We both thought that was a pretty good idea. Now we'll see if I ever get around to it... So yesterday I took 3 huge bags to Goodwill. There is still a stack of nice jeans and sweaters that are hardly worn that I kept in hopes that maybe I can sell them. We'll see. Anyway, this is what our bed looked like after we were done...



Yikes!!

Next I need to go through my makeup and toss all the old crap I don't use anymore. I'll do my kitchen last, because for some reason I have a special attachment to everything in there. It'll take some gearing up to throw stuff out from there.

It's ridiculously hot here lately. It's awesome. I was going to go work out this morning, but I think I'll just swim some laps and get some sun at the same time.

There was a beehive on our porch. I found it last night. It was SWARMING with bees. Not great news for the deathly-allergic-to-bees husband of mine. So maintenance came this morning and got rid fo it. Yuck.

I can't believe it's August. Man, the summer is FLYING!!! Our weekends are pretty much booked until school starts. And that's sad. Next week is a friend's baby shower, then our anniversary weekend, then I think my MIL is coming, then our friends from NYC are coming for Labor Day. Then school starts, and the next week we go to Boston to see BYU lose to play Boston College. Should be fun. We've never been to Boston before.

Well, the Price is Right is over, and I should get moving. The pool is calling my name!!